Like channels of water in the hand of the Lord

Where do I begin?

I was raised in the church. I asked Jesus into my heart and was baptized at a young age. I remember believing, taking my friends to church, and leading them to Christ. It was simple. But life can get complicated quickly, get you distracted.

I remember my mother’s old Gibson acoustic. I was fascinated with it way before my hands were even big enough to wrap around the neck. At about 11, I received my first electric guitar and immediately started learning how to play Motley Crue’s Kickstart My Heart. But it wasn’t until the age of 13 that I dove head first into the deep end. The Grunge movement was full-steam and I loved everything about it. I locked myself in my room and was determined to learn every riff off of the Pearl Jam Ten album. That was the beginning of my music career. From that moment forward, I obsessively pursued music, releasing multiple albums on little record labels here and there, touring (after a brief enrolment in a local art college), and living the lifestyle. At 26, armed with a successful music attorney, I was playing serious artist showcases for some serious major labels. Fame and success was so close. But as hard as I tried, I couldn’t keep a band together. We’d play a showcase and then a member would quit. We’d scramble to find a replacement, play another showcase, and someone else would leave. Finally, practically overnight, it all fell apart. I was left with nothing. But, something crazy happened. It was like God took my obsession with music and replaced it with something new: a desire to learn to write software. Weird, I know. At that time, my father had just been let go from his previous job as a software salesman and I was crazy enough to think that we could begin to write an application similar to compete with it. Well, we did. I started consuming every coding book I could get my hands on. I loved it. The lust for music success was gone and something fresh had arrived. That was about 20+ years ago.

On July 7, 2013, one day after her first birthday, my daughter had her first of two Grand Mal seizures. I remember my wife frantically bringing her to me as she called 911. Holding her in my arms- her little body convulsing -I took her outside, waiting for the ambulance, and I kneeled down to pray. “Lord, please don’t take my little girl from me.” I rode with her in the back of the ambulance, praying the whole way – like I never had before. After that day, we left the hospital without any answers. Basically, we as humans get one free pass as far as seizures go. I guess random misfires of the brain can happen. It was on a Saturday when she had her second one, and when we left the hospital that time, we went home with a diagnosis of Epilepsy. They sent us home that day with a prescription of Klonopin for our 1 year old. We struggled giving our perfect little girl the first and only dose she would ever receive that evening – watching her roll around restlessly all night long on the baby monitor. Let me tell you, things get real when you’re forced into a corner. The next day, I felt like I had a “line in the sand” moment. What is it that I truly believe? That morning, I called our church leadership and told them what had happened, and that we were coming to hijack the Sunday morning pre-service prayer meeting. About 20 people gathered around and prayed for my little baby girl that day, and she has never had another seizure in her life. That was what I refer to as my second great awakening. My life has never looked the same since then. I feel that day the things that I knew about God traveled from my head and down into my heart.

Somewhere between my transformation and now, I found a new need to physically get my hands dirty. I’ve picked up multiple projects over the years: from building motorcycles, to restoring fishing boats, modifying guitar amps, building stomp boxes, etc. I wanted to make something more tangible than just software. I’ve always been intrigued with electronic music and synthesizers. Depeche Mode Violator had a lot to do with that. I’ve bought and sold multiple synths and drum machines over the years (Quick reminiscing of my first MPC 2000 when I was 19 years old!). So it really didn’t surprise me when I got the desire to start tinkering with electronics in the fall of 2025. I somehow stumbled across Eurorack and was immediately intrigued. With the rise of all the digital microprocessor modules, it immediately seemed to be possible to try my hand at making my own. So here I am, I feel like I have been given a new desire that mingles all of my God-given passions: music, software, and art all into one. I’m not really sure where all this is going, but I plan on walking it out one step at a time with my eyes locked on the King!